.Tuesday, July 8, 2008 ' 4:46 AM Y
To the world:
miserable at best. don't bother.
don't feel sorry for me. cause i'm not.
i'm a mess. never making anything go smoothly.
a burden. always creating problems for those around me.
even the important ones.
i now realized. i followed my "wants" too much.
these "wants" were never what i really need in life.
never what i needed to do. a discovery.
i now realized what i have to do. what i need to make up for.
because everything that is going way way bad right now,
started with me.
i cannot say i tried. because i never did.
i was never someone good. someone they thought i am.
i am always the bad one. the bad guy.
they needed more than me.
she needed more than me.
so here i am. after all the chaos i made.
regretting every single move i make.
regretting being me.
miserable as always, always wanting my needs.
always being self-centered.
what ever happens to me. doesn't matter anymore.
because what's important right now.
is being there for them.
wish god can send me to hell for a day.